Yesterday was National Coming Out Day. My newsfeed was covered in rainbows and symbols. I have always honored the concept of staying true to yourself. I respect and sympathize with the struggle to reach a place of acceptance. Newsflash: As a society the struggle has ended. We have reached it. We have colorful postings, parades and mass media coverage to confirm it, and guess what? In 2016 coming out is an obsolete concept that need no longer be celebrated.
To be sure, coming out still presents personal challenges. Telling family members for example can be terrifying. Yet calling for a social celebration to acknowledge your bravery is no longer appropriate. It is personal indulgence. Why?
Being gay is no longer a closet concept in our society. Today you can be furry, pee anywhere, do any object or human in any way you wish as the more colorful aspects of our private lives are celebrated. We love ourselves and all our “secrets” and the more they are plastered on social media and the more approval we get the farther we push our boundaries. We live in a time of Fifty Shades of Everything. Want to have sex with a colorblind zebra while wearing leather chaps and sequined heels? Please do! You are an innovative soul that we will recognize through altered pronouns and our sincerest admiration.
We have erased the concept of normalcy and acknowledged that scandal lurks in all our hearts. We have reached the point where labels of any kind are irrelevant. Attraction to anything and anyone is acceptable, and self expression is the law of the land. This is not a bad thing or a good thing but a real thing.
And why should we care? Sexuality is personal. No one needs to accept or approve except yourself. You need to live with yourself, your own behavior and choices. How you choose to express yourself is of no concern to others. In spite of Facebook and Twitter, and the pleasure we get from having our own opinions reinforced (I adore zebras! I accept you. Aren’t I just wonderful?), what you do is no one’s business. Unless of course you make it our business by declaring a holiday because you are so special and we should celebrate your life choices. Why do you need others to reinforce your decisions? Be free. Have sex. Lots of it in lots of ways. Do we need to hear about it?
It is 2016. Everyone can be and love as they choose. Point made. Can we please move on?
Am I being snarky? Perhaps a little. This was a significant shift in our social construct and we reached it through the pain and struggle of thousands. Again, total respect for those who pushed to reach equality. But now that we have accepted difference, can we please turn our attention outward?
We have so many issues, life and death struggles that need to be addressed. There are real crises in our world. We must stop focusing on the intensely personal. We need relearn to see outside of our narrow self-absorbed perspectives. We are members of communities with much more pressing issues than our orgasms. Hetero, gay, bi, trans-gendered, cis, pansexual etc….It does not matter. We are all citizens of a greater society. Let us ALL put our fun into the closet together, briefly, for storage purposes, so we may focus on legitimate challenges of importance that face our world.